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[shesgotguts]

☆☆☆

"Hello! You've reached Milly Ashford. Sorry I can't answer your message right now-- you can probably figure what I'm busy doing. Leave a message for me, and I'll get back to you as soon as possible. Thanks!"

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[necktied]

[does she really
people say these things but none of it seems real
and it's a little too dangerous to grasp something just because it's what you want to hear]

who i happen to be
im not anything special you know
all of the guys that are with me are just like me
you should meet them all

freedom from titles and restrictions and all of that
thats the stuffy kind that comes with nobility
not the kind that makes you an animal
so when you say freedom i guess i want to know what that is to you
its not like wanting to be a commoner or something stupid like that right?

[shesgotguts]

but you are. youre so unique and wonderful
but id like to meet your friends!
if they have even a tenth of your kindness and charm, ill adore them

have you ever felt caged? like a bird kept on display?
inside the cage is safe but the people who have you, you dont know what theyre going to do with you. they feed you and pamper you and give you all these wonderful things and it seems nice
until you figure out that theyve been kind so they can sell you
i never want to feel like my choices arent mine again
my hand in marriage is mine to give, my body is mine to control
thats what i want
i dont care if im king or peasant. as long ive made the decisions to get there on my own.

[necktied]

hah say that to me after our date and ill believe you
youre really a charmer
good at talking to probably anyone huh...
i might not have had to be put on display like you but i know a weapon when i see it

i cant say ive ever felt any of that
pampered and groomed and given things
but i know what its like to want to command your own soul and body
to be sold off and given to others
i dont like to remember those days

you said the people that loved you did this
so do you think youve ever experienced being truly loved then?

[shesgotguts]

i can bet i will
whether or not i know how to charm anyone and everyone doesnt mean that what i say isnt true
but... weapon? me? if thats the case, i must be the human equivalent of a butter knife

you know what its like to be less than human
you were bruised and scraped up, and i wasnt. i was handled carefully.
because my purpose was to be beautiful
but you know the feeling of being used for a reason you didnt decide.

thats
hard to say
it was my parents who did it
and i think they did love me but they couldnt figure out to express it
i think if i experience love here, maybe ill know if its the first time or not